left me all [ a l o n e ] - - CADE

[PHOENIX ERIN WULFE]

she couldn't sleep. not that she'd expected too on a night like tonight anyway. the moon hung full and taunting in the sky, shining upon the lands and settng them in a glorious silver glow, draining any colour from the grounds and painting them shades of indandescent grey. clouds drifted past lazily, but they were few and far between on this night, and so mostly the light shone uninterupted upon the hogwarts castle grounds.

letting out a sigh, phoenix leant against the cold of the rail, feeling it digging into her flesh but not caring. this was when she felt the beast at it's most powerful. though the full moon had no transforming power over her - she never technically having fully changed - she still had the pure instincts and the sense of a werewolf, and sometimes on the rare occasion she was sure her canines had sharpened. but she'd never allowed herself to get so out of control before, but she knew it happened to hector sometimes.

sighing and disliking how she could feel so influenced by this stupd glowing sphere that hung in the sky, phoenix ran a hand through her hair. she was glad no one had seen her slip out of the dorm room, but .. they never did - and if they did they never cared. she often implored her senses on her midnight wanderings, never having been caught before and doubting she ever would. it was never difficult to know when someone was heading her way.

zoning out for a few moments, phoenix rested her slim arms on the cold bar of the railing, allowing the ticking of the clock to wash over her, draw her into peace. it wasn't often she felt peaceful, she was always working so hard to keeping away from people. why? for the obvious reason - she didn't want to hurt anyone, and she knew that's what she'd do if someone got to close... so absorbed was she, by her thoughts and the quiet of her surroundings, that she stopped paying attention to the idea of anyone approaching her completely...

[CADEN XAVIER WOOD]

Being bored on rounds was something that happened quite often to Cade. Walking around the school and making sure younger, and sometimes his age, stuents were keeping the curfew, sometimes got a little boring. Okay, it sometimes got a lot boring. But since he was a night owl,. who was probably more at home at night then during the day, it wasnt too bad. And it gave him some time to think too, which was something he didnt do quite often during the day, what with mucking around with friends, filling his stomach with food, and studying for his final exams that were coming up. He felt his stomach twist in worry as he thought of them. He quite often acted as if he didnt care about his grades, but he did.

He worried about them a lot, he was worried he wouldnt get the high enough marks to do something meanignful with his life, since in his parents eyes, or so Cade thought, was quidditch. And Cade didnt fly, not since he was eight years old, it terryfied him, he couldnt imagine it. Being the only Wood who was afraid to fly. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair and looked around. And for some reason he turned to climb up the clock tower. He had no idea what possesed him to do it but sudenly he was walking up the stairs, first one, then two then three and then before he knew it he was at the top. And he stopped. He wasnt alone. someone else was on the clock tower and he bit his lip. He knew her of course. It was Phoenix Wulfe, someone he had looked at from afar for quite a while, she didnt really seem like the socialble type this one.

He walked toward her, his feet light on the stone floor that paved the way to the edge of the tower. He moved to put his hand on her shoulder, not wanting to scare her, but not knowing the possible danger of what he had done, though something in him told him to back away, something also told him to walk closer to her. "Phoenix? . . . are you okay?" He said with concern in his voice. He hadnt come across her on his rounds before, so he thought this was something new, and he wasnt sure if she was going to d something stupid.

[PHOENIX ERIN WULFE]

she hadn't expected anyone to be up here right now - and so she'd stopped paying attention. she hated when her insticts took over, and as often as she could allow herself to, she tried to shut them off. which was why, right now, she'd completely tuned out the rest of the world, trying hard not to pay attention, and completely oblivious to the boy walking up to her from behind.

she hadn't heard him ascend into the clocktower, she hadn't heard his light footsteps treading toward her, she hadn't heard his heartbeat, the speed of his breath... she should have, and indeed it would have been better that she had .. but she didn't. all she suddenly felt was that hand clamping onto her shoulder. okay so perhaps he didn't clamp onto her shoulder, but it was the feeling that she got as she felt the weight of it upon her. immediatly the hairs on the back of her neck bristled, and unable to help it, an animalistic snarl ripped from her throat.

she spun tightly on her heel, agile and alert to the point of extreme as without meaning to, two long curved fangs extended from her mouth. the fangs - not of a vampire, but a wolf. it hurt, the small transision of her ordinary teeth into this great strong, sharp knives designed to rip flesh from bone. she didn't mean to do it, but she did. her eyes glinted gold as her lips pulled back over the fangs, echoes of pain aching in her jaw from the fangs. she didn't recognise the boy through her haze of .. anger? savagery? she wasn't sure what it was, but her ears caught his "Phoenix? . . . are you okay?"

it was that which snapped her from her thoughts. she knew that voice, she knew this face. cade. immediatly, the terror of what she'd just done - flashed fangs at him, snarled... possibly even been about to attack, rippled through her and she staggered back five quick steps, stumbling against the railing and feeling it dig hard into her back. she retracted the fangs as fast as she could, winces at the pain of doing so, but eyes still momentarily wide with shock and horror. she couldn't believe she'd done it. she'd lost control. after everything she'd done over the years to try and squash the wolf inside her, be good, be good enough to become a healer one day... it hadn't worked. it'd all just come out in that one surprising touch. " i-i'm i ... i'n s-so sorry." she managed to stutter out, tears pooling in her eyes as she kept trying to stumble back. what made it worse was that it'd been cade. cade. the boy she'd had a crush on since fourth year when he'd bumped into her and she'd dropped all his books.. anyone else would have shudders, pushed her out the way and hurried on .. not wanting to assosiate with a werewolf. but cade hadn't.. he stopped, appologised..and picked her books up for her, even smiling at her .. and since then she couldn't helped glancing at him in class..the corridors on occasion, though she never ever did anything about it of course.

which was why this was all the worse. she'd just almost attacked the boy she liked..

[CADEN XAVIER WOOD]

Cade heard the snarl come from Phoenix's mouth and instantly his hand came off her shoulder and he stepped back but that was it. He didnt flinch and he wasnt scared of her. While he didnt really know her personally, he knew what she was lke, he had asked one of the other students about her one day in passing, and he knew she hated hurting anything, she wouldnt hurt a fly. And she wasnt going to hurt him. His eyes moved down her and bit his lip. "Phe . . it's okay . . just .. relax . . " He held his hands up in a non threatning way and that was all the moving he did. It was like a scared animal, threaten them and they will attack, back them into a corner and they'd probably bite your head off.

He relaxed slightly and dropped his hands to his side when he saw her fagns receed, and she stagged back and his eyes widened. "Hey . . hey it's okay . . . dont fall!" He said as he moved forward quickly and made to grab her arm to stop her from falling over the railing. He didnt want her to get hurt and he didnt want it on his consience if she did. He saw the terror in her eyes and knew it was probably huim scraing her and once she was safe and not about to fall over the edge he stepped back. He shook his head and looked at her. "Dont say sorry Pheonix . . it's okay . . I shouldnt have snuck up on you . . m the one whose sorry . . kay?" He said, with a gentle tone falling into his voice.

His eyes searched her face, and it was then he notced how beautiful she was but he shook his head, trying to get rid of anything that would be those kinda feelings, after all, this really wasnt the time for flirtation or seduction. Unless she started flirting with him,. then he wouldnt be able to help himself, but for now all he did was step forward again and this time making sure she could see him he went to put his hand on her shoulder again. . "Why dont you come away from the edge?"

[PHOENIX ERIN WULFE]

"Phe . . it's okay . . just .. relax . . " she was trying, she really was! but how could she not freak? she'd spent as much of her life as she could remember trying not to hurt people, to be the person everyone thought she was, everyone named her as just because she had tainted blood. yet here she was prooving them all right - she'd almost attacked him.. if she'd bitten him ... phoenix shuddered, a tremor cursing through her whole slim frame at even the tinest thought of it. the consequences would have been astronomical ... even the smallest bite ..

"Hey . . hey it's okay . . . dont fall!" he saw his hand reaching for her and her eyes widen. "don't!" she said, going to scramble away from him; one of her hands reaching out to graps the cold railing behind her, fingers tightening around it. she was scared, that much was evident. but not of him.. of herself. she was scared that if he touched her she might hurt him. she didn't want to hurt him. not cade. not anyone really.

there was quiet for a few moments, during which time phoenix took a deep breath, exhaling slowly as she'd learnt over the years. deep breath in, slow breath out, count to ten and caaaalm. it had the usual influence on her, her shoulders slumping a little, the rigidness of her body relaxed, but she still trembled a little. still a little on edge."Dont say sorry Pheonix . . it's okay . . I shouldnt have snuck up on you . . m the one whose sorry . . kay?" she shook her head. "don't be.. i should have been paying attention." she said, frowning at herself. "i shouldn't have let myself slip.." she never usually allowed herself a moment of cmplete relation.. she needed to be on guard, keep herself in very tight check. she didn't want to lash out at all if someone muttered something mean about her and she heard... and so she tended not to ever allow herself to lapse..so she wouldn't be caught of guard... because look what had happened.

her eyes were wary as he stepped forward and she tensed. even though she .. for some reason.. trusted cade, knew he wouldn't physically hurt her at least, and that there was no reason to be wary as he came toward her, she couldn't help it but be a little defensive. she worried that he would come after her for that... some people would have - yelled at her or cursed her... something of the sort. so she was surprised and somewhere, deep down delighted as he touched her shoulder. the contact causing a small shock of .. something .. as this time she didn't pull away. "Why dont you come away from the edge?" she looked at him then her eyes travelled slowly to where she was standing. she hadn't meant to be so close..but she'd needed to get away from him before she'd hurt him .. and this was where she'd ended up. she bit her lower lip and took a small step toward him, away from the edge, but made no further movement.

[CADEN XAVIER WOOD]

Caden shook his head when she said he shouldnt be sorry. It had been his fault really, he should have snuck on her. He knew better then to sneak up on anyone. Especially someone so close to the edge of the clock tower. He smiled gently when she took a step forward and his hand slid down her arm gently. "See . . wasnt so hard was it?" He said, he also took a small step back from her, knowing that him being in close proximity wasnt helping matters.

He knew what she was, but he didnt blame her for it, or think any less of her. She seemed nice so far, and he really wouldnt have minded h aving a chunk takin out of his shoulder. Though he probably wouldnt have taken to kidnly to having what came with it though, but again, it wasnt her fault.

He dropped his hand from her arm and folded them across his chest and looked at her. "So . . nice night to see the moon isnt it? . . " THen he realised what he said and he frowned slightly. "Sorry . . that was low . . I mean . . I . . the moon . . i'll just stop talking now" He said with his lopsided grin he put on when he did something stupid, in the hopes that people around him would forgive him. He flexed his arms slightly to stretch them and he ran his hand through his hair and looked at her. His eyes looked over her face., and his mouth hinted at a smile agian.

[PHOENIX ERIN WULFE]

as his hand slid down her arm her eyes widened slightly, a slight tremour coursing through her body. her instincts were still on high alert and the full of the moon was certainly not helping the matter. the wolf within her was far from sadated right now, and it was trying to rise again. the boy was going to be in trouble if he wasn't careful, despite phoenix's usually incredible self control. as he took a step back, her body of her own accord betrayed her and she followed him slightly, taking the smallest step after him, and then catching herself and biting her lip.

"See . . wasnt so hard was it?" she shook her head, though she wondered if he thought she'd been planning on jumping. certainly not - even if her life wasn't the greatest she would never be suicidal. "So . . nice night to see the moon isnt it? . . " she blinked and raised her eyebrows, watching him frown and unable to help a smile flit across her face. "Sorry . . that was low . . I mean . . I . . the moon . . i'll just stop talking now" she shook her head, running a hand through her hair and pushing it out the way of her eyes.

" it's okay, cade...don't worry about it. i'm sure if i didn't hate it so much...i'd like the moon...if that makes sense?" she said, smiling kindly. she wasn't turning him away, he was the first guy in a long time who'd spoken to her beside hector...and more than that, he was the first guy to really touch her. not a stable thing to think about on a night where she was so out of control. when he grinned her eyes softened, feeling her heart skip a beat and then speed up a little. "no don't stop talking.." she said softly, she enjoyed the sound of his voice, she didn't want to stand in silence with him...but being with him was enough anyway.

[CADEN XAVIER WOOD]

" it's okay, cade...don't worry about it. i'm sure if i didn't hate it so much...i'd like the moon...if that makes sense?" Cade laughed lightly and nodded slightly. He guess it made sense. He was in the same boat, well he kinda was. He was afraid of flying, like she was afraid of the moon. He could see the beauty in the flight whenever he felt the fear flicker away for a moment. "Yeah . . it makes perfect sense" He said as he ran his hand through his hair again and his lopsided smile crossed his face again. "I know it makes sense . . because I get what you mean" He said gently.

"so dont stop talking then hey?" . . . Cade said as he tilted his head slightly and made to sit against the wall of the clock tower. "I'll keep talking . . ooonly if you sit with me?"

[/color]He said as he patted the ground next to her and smiled. He . . He felt a little diffrent with this girl, he barely knew her, and yet, he felt so at home around her and he was in a good mood because she was around, well he was always in a good mood, but this was something diffrent. He looked at her still and bit his lip as he thought. "Oh I know! . . " He grinned slightly. "Soooo . . how have you been liking the weather?" He said with a slight laugh. He was joking of course, but thats all he had to say right now, or ask her. for now anyway.
[/justify][/size][/blockquote][/blockquote][/blockquote]

[PHOENIX ERIN WULFE]

"Yeah . . it makes perfect sense" she raised her eyebrows. "it does?" she asked, sure that it hadn't really and she smiled gently.. well at least he was being polite about it. she watched him run a hand through his hair and something inside her itched to be brushing it back herself. she had to pick at the sleve of her top to avoid reaching out and running her hand through his locks, curious as to what it would feel like..

"I know it makes sense . . because I get what you mean" she smiled gently, blushing slightly. he really was polite wasn't it - but something about her wondered if he really did understand... maybe he had a simular kinda.. feeling? she hated the moon for what it represented to her, for what it had meant in her past, what it did to her and generally everything that came with it. there was a beauty about it but she couldn't quite apprechiate it.. and she knew that if she was not so closely linked to it, she would love the moon... she just.. couldn't.

"so dont stop talking then hey?" she nodded, smiling a little shyly. she almost blurted that she liked his voice, but luckily she managed to stop herself from doing so. her eyes watched his every movement almost hungrily, the wolf inside not abated yet.. it wanted something, and it wasn't going to let up until it's hunger was satisfied. "I'll keep talking . . ooonly if you sit with me?" she blushed properly this time, the red tinging her cheeks and she grinned. "of course." she said, heading over to him. she sat down beside him, a little closer than she'd intended and causing her shoulder to brush his, her legs brushing his...

she bit her lip and looked at him, heartbeat thudding almost painfully as her eyes traced his handsome face. why couldn't she calm down? what was taking her over with every sound of his voice? every look at his face? "Oh I know! . . " she raised her eyebrows with intriege. "Soooo . . how have you been liking the weather?" she laughed lightly and rolled her eyes, shaking her head. "i don't want to talk about the weather.." she said boldly, and before she could stop herself, think about what she was doing, realise anything... she was looking up at him, leaning toward his warmth, his strength.. and going to press her lips to his.

[CADEN XAVIER WOOD]

Something in Cade jolted when her leg brushed his, and he fought back a shiver as her shoulder brushed his slightly. His eyes trailed to her face as she did, the smoothness of them, the slight red tinge to her cheeks that made her look slightly embarrassed, nervous but still so sure all at the same time. Without thinking, his hand moved to her cheek and he fan his thumb down her cheek gently. Tracing the line of pink that was still visible, She pulled back rather quickly, after all, what had happened last time he had touched her, he didn't really want it to happen again, they were closer this time, this time and this close she would have easier to bite him, even though deep down he knew she wouldn't.

"Oh so you don't wanna talk about the weather do you?" He said with a smile. He rolled his eyes slightly and was surprised as she was suddenly pressing her lips to hers in a kiss and he couldn't help it, he slid his hand around to the back of her neck and moved to shift toward her. Sure he hadn't started this kiss, but hell, he sure wasn't gonna pull away. Especially since it already felt like no kiss he had ever had. He made to deepen it slightly, his hand moving from the ground to slide around her waist. And then, in that moment, everything seemed to stop.

[PHOENIX ERIN WULFE]

as his fingertips brushed along her cheek she couldn't help the natural reaction to lean into the touch, her eyes widened slightly in surprise that she wasn't scared of being so close to him... oh she was still scared of hurting him, but she was carefully controlling herself, trying to ensure that she watched his every mood so that she wasn't surprised and caught of guard again. that was the only time she really lost control was when she wasn't expecting something.. when she really truly let her guard down.

which was why she was shocked at herself for going to kiss cade like that. she wasn't sure why but something inside her had compelled her to, and when his lips responded, kissing her back that chased away her worries instantly. his hands went to the back of her neck..her wasit, and her hearbeat responded with a fast pounding against her ribcage, her arms going to wrap around his neck and pull herself right up close to him. she didn't understand this..hunger, this passion. she'd never felt anything like it before, not really..she was always so calm, so careful, so controlled..but the beast inside had struggled and clawed it's way out, and only now was it's hunger being satisfied...

so this is what she had wanted from cade? him? it wasn't something phoenix had expected, but as he made to deepen to kiss she responded instantly, running her fingers gently into his soft hair, feelign the soft texture of the brown locks and smiling slightly against his warm lips. she didn't know what this was or where it was going but the wolf in her didn't care...all it cared about was it's hunger being abated by this boy, and it wasn't letting go til it had what it wanted...

[CADEN XAVIER WOOD]

Cade felt her fingers run through his hair and he shivered slightly He pulled her closer to him in response, and he opened his eyes to look at her as he kissed her, before closing his eyes again. He couldnt beleive it, this wad really hapening quick, and he thought she hated him, seeing as how she had racted at first, but now he was thinking it was the opposite, and the way she was kissing him back, possibl;y felt like she had been wanting to for a while. He slid his hand to her stomach, going to try and slip his fingers between the fabric and undo it. He was guessing she wouldnt object . . . . and then suddenly they were laying on the ground . . . and it all went from there . .

- - SKIP TO MOOOORNING! - -

Eerly the next morning, the sun was streaming through the windows in the clock tower. Cade shifted as the rays of sun hit his face but he stayed sleeping, he didnt wake up easy. He was laying on his jacket, spread out the night before to stop him or pheonix feel the cold. It had been a great night, and right now, Cade was asleep with a smile on his face. He rolled back over and made to drape his arm around the very person who had made the night so wonderful, or at least from cade's point of view. He shifted his head in his sleep and made to shift agianst her, he was a restless sleeper, he always had been, and he made to nuzzle his head into the back of her neck so his face was out of the sun, and slowly, he was falling back into a deeper sleep.

[PHOENIX ERIN WULFE]

as he continued to kiss her she stopped thinking altogether. she didn't want to worry about what might happen from this... what might happen tomorrow... whether she should be doing this or not. she just kept kissing him, revelling in the moment and the feelings his touch elicited from her. she felt his hand on her stomach, fumbling to take it off, and her own hands wandered from his hair down to the hem of his shirt, trying to pull it off over his head. she wasn't sure when it happened but suddenly they were on the ground and then ... what happened next was history ...

- - IN ZEE MORNIN' - -

phoenix didn't usually sleep that well on a full moon night, but somehow she did. it was only when she felt the shifting of another warm body against her own that caused her to stir. warm breath on the back of her neck caused her to stir further and she shifted her head, at first going to shift back toward the warm strong torso beside her, feeling an odd sense of ease and comfort, particulary with his arm over her. it was odd, she'd have thought that it would have scared her to realise someone was beside her.. considering her guard was so down right now.. but no, she felt completely relaxed and comfortable with cade beside her.

rather than driftign back to sleep, foggy thoughts subsided and phoenix started to wake properly, shifting and yawned, blinking her eyes open.. and then freezing. what had she done! that was the first thought that ran through her mind. of course.. she couldn't deny that last night had been... amazing.. incredible.... the best night she'd ever experienced but... but that didn't mean it was right.. well, it hadn't felt wrong but... she could have hurt him.. she'd been so out of control! what if she had?! biting her lower lip hard in worry, pheonix turned carefully in his arms to look at him, wide awake now her eyes glazed over him quickly, trying to ignore his perfection in order to make sure she hadn't hurt him.. he seemed okay but.. but still.. she shouldn't have...

swallowing, phoenix made to kiss his forehead with the gentlest of kisses before trying to pull out from under his arm, as quietly as she could going to grab her clothes and pull them on. twice she yanked her top on the wrong way round and she contemplated just leaving it like that.. but then if she ran into someone they'd know something was up ... she ran a hand through her hair. she was.. so confused. on the one hand.. she.. she couldn't believe it had happened and she was well.. she felt so happy and all but .. there was that other side of her that was..terrified....

[CADEN XAVIER WOOD]

Shifting into the deeper sleep, Cade's smile turned to a slight frown as he shifted his head against the back of her neck and yawned. Settling once again, suddenly images were flashing through his head, fuzzy images. Him and pheonix, dancing under the moonlight, somewhere in the night,. barefoot on the ground, snow falling on them, and nothing in the world matteres. The next image flashed infront of his eyes and it was of him and phe again. this time, they were watching a baby toddler, a baby boy, running around the grassed area out the back of his family home.

He felt someone press their lips to his head and his eyes flickered open, that dream had woken him up, but instead of scaring the shit out of him like if should have, it filled him with a warm feeling, one of acomplishment, like it was something imortant. He blinked his eyes open as he felt that pheionix was no longer beside him and he propped himself up on his elbows and yawned. "Morning . . " He said, his voice still think with sleep as he mused his hair with his hand and ran a hand over his face and a tired, lopsided smile fell acorss his face as he watched her pull her clothes on. He could feel he had his pants on still,. but his shirt was off and he saw it laying across from him and he reached it, pulling it over her head and looking at her. "You wanna get breakfast? . . talk about . . last night?" . . He said as he bit his lip, scared of what she'd do.

[PHOENIX ERIN WULFE]

she hadn't realised he was awake... again, she'd allowed her guard to slip... and so when she heard his sleepy "Morning . . " she jumped out of her skin, luckily in her mind enough not to flash fang at him or growl or anything as such ridiculous and embarrassing. she bit her lip and turned to look at him, having hoped she wouldn't wake him ... having wanted to just be able to slip away and then .. he could go on forgetting her and be with other girls..prettier girls..better girls...

she was frozen, not sure what to do as she watched him pull his shirt on, trying hard not to remember the image of her pulling it off him the night before or the texture of his chest on her hands. she shouldn't dwell on the memoires..it would only hurt more when she saw him flirting with some other girl... "You wanna get breakfast? . . talk about . . last night?" she bit her lip and swallowed, running a hand through her 'bed headed' hair and shaking her head slightly. "i'm ... not hungry i ..last night was great really.. you were uhm .. great." she was flustered, she had no idea what to say what to do .. she'd never been in a situation like this and she just..couldn't. "i should..uh go.." she managed to splutter, already backing for the stairs. "nice to uhm.. meet you and i .. see ... you around.." she swallowed hard and turned, rushing down the stairs as quick as she could, heart pounding, thoughts all over the place..